Lesson learnt.

I went! After all that drama i went and it was A okay. Phew!
I swear, i have a bad habit of dramatizing anything and everything, and this Saturday was a good example of that dramatization. It is exhausting!
Well, twas good to just get out of the house and not study! Yay! However, staying on track. We had mass, and about 10 mins went and X came, then another 5 mins passed by and Y came. It was a terrible feeling because it was my entire fault that this happened so, i thought back to what had happened with some other people and how i - somewhat - fixed that problem and thought, 'this will work too!'. Oh boy was i wrong. Okay, so at the end of mass i asked them both to sit down and that failed (i should have stopped there), then i said, 'it doesn't take a genius too see it is awkward between you two, so you should talk about it'. Then i left them to talk, and after that i think i just made thins more awkward. Seriously! I thought that was a really good idea! I guess not. People prefer to stew and not get things off their chest. That was not my most proud moment, however, i have learnt.

After mass, i got to talk to her again. It is really good, because everytime i talk to her i really see how much she i improving, and she is having treatment! I mean, i didn't start to improve til a couple of months after treatment. She is a real inspiration.

Then after the movie - amazing grace - i talked to this other lady, who i believe is the lady who indirectly gave me the Lourdes water. I striked a lovely conversation with her before she asked me 'how i was'. That is the give away question, as to people knowing a certain amount about spot and his residual side effects. Which is strange because i really don't mind people knowing, but i want to be the one to tell them. Because telling someone you have a brain tumour is hard enough, especially when you see their reaction. I really don't want other people, who don't have spot, to be exposed to peoples reactions. Sometimes it really does break your heart and you don't want anyone else to have to see that.

If i have learnt anything it is that you cannot force people to talk to one another no matter how much you care for both and want them to be happy. Maybe they are meant to be happy but just at seperate ends of the earth.