Anger. Bad, very Bad!

Very recently i have been getting angry at nearly everything, simply washing up!
It is beyond frustrating and it just feels as if i cannot do anything to change however that really is not the case, i need to forgive & forget, because as it says in this article i just read if you don't forgive you are the one drinking poison not the other person! 
So, one thing i, and everyone, should do is doing a 'gratitude exercise', you basically write down everything whether that be past or present that you are/ have been grateful for.

Here goes, this is mine:
1. I am beyond grateful to BE ALIVE!
2. Having my parents around during the whole diagnosis, cancer, radio & after affects. I really don't know what i would have done if you weren't there for me. That has to be one of the biggest things i am grateful for. BIGGEST!    
3. Even if they aren't my definition of 'perfect', but my friends.
4. To have met all the inspirational people in hospital, showing me that i really do not have the worst diagnosis.
5. I am grateful for being able to return to uni, and now FT. Yay!
6. Monk! I love that show it always makes me laugh when nothing else can.
7. For my fav. doc. to call me a 'remarkable young lady'. That seriously made my day, after what i believed to be a crummy day at uni however it was myself that made it so sad.
8. To gaining good marks at uni - i believe that is because of spot's removal.
9. Being able to have Ben as a good friend until recently when i finally realised how different we truly are, as much as it breaks my heart. 

11. Having my parents around during the whole diagnosis, cancer, radio & after affects. I really don't know what i would have done if you weren't there for me. That has to be one of the biggest things i am grateful for. BIGGEST!
12. For my neurosurgeon being compassionate and telling me spot was malignant in an unusual, but perfectly tailored way.
13. Pretty/ unpretty (glee version) provided the last song i remember listening to before the major OP and this one line stuck in my head "i pity any girl who isn't me tonight". Now it was a surgery performed in the morning however, i just pitied any girl who wasn't as lucky as me to be diagnosed with enough time to be operated on. 
14. Another song - Stronger, Kelly Clarkson - was in the charts after my surgery and during my radiotherapy. It gave me strength because after everything i would be 'stronger'.
15. I have the strength to get over Ben.    

Too True

"love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; And therefore is winged cupid painted blind?" - William Shakespeare.

Strength!

You know how Taylor Swift has come out with that new song about not getting back together with her boyfriend? Well, that is exactly how i feel about (someone we shall call..) 'womanizer'. It is so annoying because i have become quite comfortable with being, not so faithful because i have realized i was simply being a more faithful person to feel as if i belonged in that family. Even after all of the effort i went to i was not included in that family.

Therefore, i must have the inner strength to metaphorically slam the door in his face because he is a page in the book of my life that i have turned over and am ready to meet all the other people which i will meet because i wont have him breathing down my neck and frightening off all 'potential' suiters. I am being optimistic you see.